So…yeah… looks like protein water starting tomorrow until Wednesday.
I took the day off because I’m still recovering from this horrible cold, yet somehow I have lots of energy. Might as well use it, I suppose.
- Go for a run.
- Drink my weight in Camomile tea.
- Take my Modern American Politics & Economics test.
- Sketch (using my new charcoal sticks.)
- Look at fish in the pet store.
- DIY something.
- Make art.
As it turns out, I’ve reached my ultimate goal weight about 3 times now, and every time I reach it I’m expecting a feeling of accomplishment. The thing is, I never feel accomplished. But it hit me- holding on to something so tiny and obsessing over “the one thing” that’ll make me happy if I have it, hasn’t made me happy. Over the past two years since I’ve had this blog, I’ve gone through at least 5 relationships, lost nearly all my friends, damaged my health from stress, and forgot how to prioritize. Looking a certain way won’t make my problems disappear, nor will just being healthy. I admit, I’ve been going about this the wrong way, but I’ve also been missing the bigger picture. Yes, I still want the same thing- to be happy with my body- but that’s only an element of my overall happiness. “Perfection” is ever-changing development. Perfection is not limited to one’s physical characteristics and cannot be achieved if the body is not cared for along side the psyche.
So now my new “ultimate goal” consists of the following:
- Purge my body of toxins and maintain wellness.
- Build strength, endurance, and balance.
- Attain an overall glow of health.
- Rediscover my identity.
- Learn to prioritize.
- Empathize with others.
- Live in a constant state of learning.
- Get a new job.
- Focus on school and graduating.
- Reconnect with old friends.
- Start making music again.
- Make more art in general.
- Find new hobbies.
- Visit new places, try new things, and eat different foods.
- Open up to people.